Please Review One Page Of My Site

[EricB]

Instead of having people review my entire site, I just want to focus on one page and get any feedback people have. To give some background, this pages main focus is to get photographers to register for our site. By talking with different photographers, I identified the three key challenges they commonly face and this page describes how we plan to address them. Let me know what you think.

http://photographydifferent.com/photographer



Thanks in advance!

[torka]

The content is clear and benefits-focused, which I like. Thing is, the page looks a little "bland" to me, especially for a site that targets photographers. I don't necessarily mean you need to load the page up with irrelevant images, but maybe a photo or two of a professional photographer at work? Just something to "jazz up" the page's appearance a bit.

Also, I'd like to see some more differentiation in the text. Use some bold face type here and there to emphasize some key phrases. Say, in the first paragraph, bold "photographers are being undervalued" and perhaps "find new customers".

Also, your response form is all the way down at the bottom of the page, well "below the fold." Could you potentially turn this into a two-column page with the text on the left and the response form on the right? Or maybe the introductory paragraph as full-width and the rest of the page split between the "bullet" benefit paragraphs and the form.

ALso, update the headline on the form to include the word "FREE" (that's a powerful motivator): maybe something along the lines of "Register Today -- It's FREE!" (That's just off the top of my head. I'm sure you can come up with something better.)

But by rearranging the page, the form itself is visible from the time they load the page so people can see right away what the "purpose" of the page is.

If they're interested in the text, they can read it all. If they're in a hurry they can just skim the paragraph headings. But either way, the form is still right there so even if they don't scroll down (and some won't) it's already visible.

My

--Torka

[EricB]

Thank you so much for your input, it's nice to get a different perspective because it's easy to miss things since I'm living in it every day. I took your advice and mocked up a different page, same information just different format using your advice. I'd love your feedback if that is any better:

http://photographydifferent.com/Photographer


Thanks in advance!

[torka]

Definitely an improvement, IMO! I think the lines of text are still a little long for easy readability. Most user experience experts say you should aim for around 12 words / 75 characters max per line. Anything longer than that gets difficult to scan on the screen. Is there anything you can do to shorten the line-length?

I'd also like to see the text just a skoosh larger, if possible. Or at least with a little bit bigger line-height to give it some more "breathing room." I think it would have more impact that way. Your copy is very good. I'd hate to see it get "skimmed over"!

I do like how you got the "register for FREE" call to action up closer to the top. You almost can't make a call to action too prominent, and when it's got the word "FREE" in it, that's always a plus.

--Torka

[EricB]

Torka, you're good! You have an eye for this. I tightened up the wording and shortened each bullet point to 1 sentence. I did leave the first intro paragraph as is because I feel like that is really important and I didn't want to touch it. I also cleaned up the icons a bit for a more polished look. Thank you so much for your extremely helpful feedback!