Welcome to the Small Business Ideas Forum! We are a community of over 100,000 small business folks with over 163,000 posts for you to browse. We pride ourselves on being the friendliest forum you will find and we'd love to have you as a member of our community. Please take a moment and register for a free account. If you need any help, please contact Chris Logan.

Small Business Ideas Forum

Small Business Ideas Forum

A friendly place to share small business ideas and knowledge, ask questions, find help and encourage others that are involved in the small business industry. Topics include small business marketing, generating revenue and small business computing.

Go Back   Small Business Ideas Forum > Small Business Marketing - Online > Copywriting
Register Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 24th September 2014, 03:05 PM   #1
danieldd
Member
 

Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: London, UK
Posts: 73
Send a message via Skype™ to danieldd
Default Review This Copy Please!

I am writing with a request for anyone who has the time and willingness to help. This is a copy I've written, and I want to ask you to walk in the shoes of a person who wants to hire a cleaner for his/hers home.

One day you decided you are fed up with your apartment's condition. Those floors look dirtier than ever, you don't even have a mop, the bathroom is in a terrible mouldy state. You finally decide to Google for domestic cleaners in London and spot the following website (yes, it really ranks):

http://domesticcleaners.co.uk/

You start reading the copy. You probably have some expectations as to what answers should the website give you. Besides the obvious "what are the prices, am I able to afford it?",
  • what other questions do you have prior to entering the website?
  • are the answers available there?
  • what is the brand name of the company?
  • does the website build trust in you?
  • do you feel like the service will be of superior quality?

Your critique is welcome and will be appreciated. Hope a good copy writer will take his/hers time to do me this favour of evaluating my content.

danieldd is offline   Reply With Quote
Register or log in to remove this ad.
Old 24th September 2014, 05:54 PM   #2
KAYSER
Member
 

Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 23
Default

At first look, the website looks Good, easy to navigate, and I think it stimulates trust. after this first impression, I always go to the testimonial page and start reading, I even go to reviews on other websites. If I decided to call, and for some reason, no answer, they didn't get back to my massage fast enough. I never trust it.

__________________
Sew Passion Inc.
KAYSER is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11th October 2014, 06:28 AM   #3
Fourtus
Member
 

Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Edinburgh
Posts: 1
Default Impression that Copy Made on Me

The main thing I was looking for was reassurance. If I am letting a third party into my home or office I need to trust them.
The testimonials helped, but I think extra reassurance could be given to ensure that they are really genuine. "If you would like to speak to one of our current customers, please call..."
The fact that the business has been operating for a long time was positive. I would have liked a bit more personal reassurance "My name is John and I founded this business in 2002 with the aim..."
Well, that my tuppenceworth. Overall I rather liked the simplicity and tone of the site.

Hope that helps

David
Edinburgh

Fourtus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 14th January 2017, 11:52 PM   #4
GlennAlan
Member
 

Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 9
Default How to GUARANTEE Most Visitors to your Website HIRE YOU

Dear Daniel,

You are in the TRUST BUSINESS - not the cleaning biz.

So.

Your Website must answer these 3 Questions -

QUESTION #1

Where is the PROOF I can TRUST you and your Team?

Trust - testimonials - case studies
Endorsements.

QUESTION #2 -

Please PROVE and Show and Tell The 3 Ways Your Service is
Better,
Different,
Unique - from your competitors in my area (Speaking in the voice of home owner)

QUESTION #3 -

Your prospects are LAZY.

So GIFT them with Questions they can ASK
to find the Best Help.

In my Copywriting I like to GHOST SHOP the competition.

Find out what YOU do that they don't.

Then Write a website SURVEY
or a SPECIAL REPORT you Email when prospects CALL YOU.

The Title?

"7 Questions to Ask Before You Hire a _____"

Knowing that all the prospects who ask your Competitors those 7 Questions
will
COME BACK
and HIRE YOU!

Because only you Do those 7 things.

Thanks,
Glenn

GlennAlan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 19th January 2017, 12:23 PM   #5
SARubin
Member
 
SARubin's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: New Hampshire, USA
Posts: 14
Default

I think your website looks good. Easy on the eyes, and easy to navigate.

Although, as a copywriter one thing that hit me right away was the "BENEFITS OF CHOOSING US" box. It's listing "features" more than "benefits."

A feature is what you do... A benefit is what it's going to do for me.

Here's a couple examples for you. From your home page:

"Same-day and next-day service arrangements" (feature)
"which means your home can be professionally cleaned before you go to bed tonight." (benefit)


"Specialized detergents and high-end equipment." (feature)
"which means we can eliminate even the worst messes, for you." (benefit)


Of course, I don't know who your clients are, so you would need to do a little research to determine what benefits they desire. Then adjust your copy accordingly.

But these are a couple basic examples of the difference between features and benefits.

Hope this helps.

All the best,
SARubin

SARubin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31st January 2017, 10:34 AM   #6
yattwards
Member
 

Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: The Internet! I don't give that info away online.
Posts: 10
Default Another suggestion.

I really like the way the website is organized. I was able to find the domestic cleaning service very easy.

I do have a suggestion though that builds the "establish trust" ideology. I don't think it would hurt to have a few reviews right on the service page, but it would be even better if you could include a few before and after photos! They wouldn't necessarily have to be professional. Sending your employees out with a camera to take some photo's would do the trick for me.

yattwards is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 2nd February 2017, 11:39 AM   #7
Fotis_Chat
Member
 

Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Athens
Posts: 2
Default

Talk with past clients and see what their number one worry was when hiring similar services.

This is your headline. Turn it into a question and catch their attention.

If you are 100% sure of your service, offer a bold guarantee. Like giving 100% of their money back plus buying them a cleaning session from your competitor. There is going to be a 1-3% of a$$holes who take advantage of that. But this will open the floodgates for more high-quality customers as well.

Fotis_Chat is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 14th March 2017, 09:52 AM   #8
billdrop
Member
 

Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 1
Default

I like it very much

billdrop is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply   

Bookmarks


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Copywriting Tips Mark Andrews Copywriting 4 9th January 2014 05:13 AM
Use An Email Marketing Service? Please Review It-- CodyLoco Newsletters and Email Marketing 2 29th March 2012 01:29 PM
Copy Writing Review robertclarkmtfs Copywriting 3 3rd May 2011 11:50 PM
Forget Traffic! Get Your Copy Right! David Jackson Copywriting 23 26th January 2010 12:09 AM
Review Some Copy And Layout Suggestions ruffneck119 Reviews 0 20th June 2008 12:21 PM



Thread Tools

Get Updates
RSS Feeds:
RSS Feed for Copywriting RSS for this Category Only: Copywriting

RSS Feed for Small Business Ideas Forum RSS for Entire Forum
Forum Rules


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


Our volunteer moderators and their websites:
David Wallace
SearchRank - Organic Search Engine Optimization
Old Welsh Guy
Internet Marketing from Wales in the UK
torka
NineYards.com: Helping Businesses Do Business Online
Small Business Answers
Free help to grow your business.

New at Search Engine Guide
The 4 Types Of Website Traffic

New at Small Business Answers
Contractor Estimate - Cancel Contract - Bill of Sale - Evaluation Questions

Employee Evaluation Templates
30 Day Review - 90 Day Review - Annual Review - Employee Self Evaluation - Strength & Weaknesses

New at Small Business Forum
Unusual Ways To Promote Your Business

Crimson Fox
Graphic Design and Brand Promotion and the Brand Design Blog
St0n3y
Search Marketing Results - Pole Position Marketing!
Search Marketing Info - (EMP) E-Marketing Performance
Matt McGee
Small Business SEM - Web marketing discussion for small businesses.
Logan
Tiny Doors Frisco
Things To Do

At Your Business - Small Business Directory
Free Business Forms - Prewritten Documents

Free Links - Free Advertising
Free Guide - Online Directory
Debra Mastaler
Alliance-Link
The Link Spiel Blog
ChristineG
Free Online Marketing and Social Media Tips: Social Media Simplified for Small Business Owners
mktgbiz
Promotional Items Marketing
What I REALLY think!


Visit our small business websites
Small Business Forum | Small Business Answers | Search Engine Guide

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:12 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.3
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2004 - 2015 K. Clough, Inc. - Privacy