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-   -   Review This Copy Please! (http://www.smallbusinessbrief.com/forum/showthread.php?t=65796)

danieldd 24th September 2014 02:05 PM

Review This Copy Please!
 
I am writing with a request for anyone who has the time and willingness to help. This is a copy I've written, and I want to ask you to walk in the shoes of a person who wants to hire a cleaner for his/hers home.

One day you decided you are fed up with your apartment's condition. Those floors look dirtier than ever, you don't even have a mop, the bathroom is in a terrible mouldy state. You finally decide to Google for domestic cleaners in London and spot the following website (yes, it really ranks):

http://domesticcleaners.co.uk/

You start reading the copy. You probably have some expectations as to what answers should the website give you. Besides the obvious "what are the prices, am I able to afford it?",
  • what other questions do you have prior to entering the website?
  • are the answers available there?
  • what is the brand name of the company?
  • does the website build trust in you?
  • do you feel like the service will be of superior quality?

Your critique is welcome and will be appreciated. Hope a good copy writer will take his/hers time to do me this favour of evaluating my content.

KAYSER 24th September 2014 04:54 PM

At first look, the website looks Good, easy to navigate, and I think it stimulates trust. after this first impression, I always go to the testimonial page and start reading, I even go to reviews on other websites. If I decided to call, and for some reason, no answer, they didn't get back to my massage fast enough. I never trust it.

Fourtus 11th October 2014 05:28 AM

Impression that Copy Made on Me
 
The main thing I was looking for was reassurance. If I am letting a third party into my home or office I need to trust them.
The testimonials helped, but I think extra reassurance could be given to ensure that they are really genuine. "If you would like to speak to one of our current customers, please call..."
The fact that the business has been operating for a long time was positive. I would have liked a bit more personal reassurance "My name is John and I founded this business in 2002 with the aim..."
Well, that my tuppenceworth. Overall I rather liked the simplicity and tone of the site.

Hope that helps

David
Edinburgh

GlennAlan 14th January 2017 10:52 PM

How to GUARANTEE Most Visitors to your Website HIRE YOU
 
Dear Daniel,

You are in the TRUST BUSINESS - not the cleaning biz.

So.

Your Website must answer these 3 Questions -

QUESTION #1

Where is the PROOF I can TRUST you and your Team?

Trust - testimonials - case studies
Endorsements.

QUESTION #2 -

Please PROVE and Show and Tell The 3 Ways Your Service is
Better,
Different,
Unique - from your competitors in my area (Speaking in the voice of home owner)

QUESTION #3 -

Your prospects are LAZY.

So GIFT them with Questions they can ASK
to find the Best Help.

In my Copywriting I like to GHOST SHOP the competition.

Find out what YOU do that they don't.

Then Write a website SURVEY
or a SPECIAL REPORT you Email when prospects CALL YOU.

The Title?

"7 Questions to Ask Before You Hire a _____"

Knowing that all the prospects who ask your Competitors those 7 Questions
will
COME BACK
and HIRE YOU!

Because only you Do those 7 things.

Thanks,
Glenn

SARubin 19th January 2017 11:23 AM

I think your website looks good. Easy on the eyes, and easy to navigate. :thumbsup2

Although, as a copywriter one thing that hit me right away was the "BENEFITS OF CHOOSING US" box. It's listing "features" more than "benefits."

A feature is what you do... A benefit is what it's going to do for me.

Here's a couple examples for you. From your home page:

"Same-day and next-day service arrangements" (feature)
"which means your home can be professionally cleaned before you go to bed tonight." (benefit)


"Specialized detergents and high-end equipment." (feature)
"which means we can eliminate even the worst messes, for you." (benefit)


Of course, I don't know who your clients are, so you would need to do a little research to determine what benefits they desire. Then adjust your copy accordingly.

But these are a couple basic examples of the difference between features and benefits.

Hope this helps.

All the best,
SARubin

yattwards 31st January 2017 09:34 AM

Another suggestion.
 
I really like the way the website is organized. I was able to find the domestic cleaning service very easy.

I do have a suggestion though that builds the "establish trust" ideology. I don't think it would hurt to have a few reviews right on the service page, but it would be even better if you could include a few before and after photos! They wouldn't necessarily have to be professional. Sending your employees out with a camera to take some photo's would do the trick for me.

Fotis_Chat 2nd February 2017 10:39 AM

Talk with past clients and see what their number one worry was when hiring similar services.

This is your headline. Turn it into a question and catch their attention.

If you are 100% sure of your service, offer a bold guarantee. Like giving 100% of their money back plus buying them a cleaning session from your competitor. There is going to be a 1-3% of a$$holes who take advantage of that. But this will open the floodgates for more high-quality customers as well.

billdrop 14th March 2017 08:52 AM

I like it very much

jeffscott 9th September 2018 10:43 PM

For every product and services it is important to have reviews from the past users for the visitors to have good impression and building trust for the brand.


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